For the Love of Lists

I love lists. I write my to-do lists in multiple places. For fastest access, I use my small notepad that I keep my purse. I also write lists on my white-board. And I make note of things in my cell phone calendar as well as my paper calendar.

I love lists, but I also need lists to remember what I need to do and when. Important things to remember get written in multiple places. Very important things, or events I can’t forget, are starred, underlined, and/or circled. If it’s something I keep putting off but know I need to do, it usually gets starred, underlined, and circled.

I love making and organizing a list. And there’s a certain satisfaction in one by one crossing off the things I’ve finished. It’s like a rewarding oneself for a small accomplishment. If I wrote in pencil or on the dry-erase white-board, I erase them. But if I used pen, I scratch it out. Sometimes I scratch it out so vehemently that it just becomes a big black mark on the page. 

I have also begun getting in the habit of emailing reminders to myself. It’s getting almost obsessive and ridiculous!

Word Confusion (Part 2)

Confusing words is a problem I’ve had for as long as I can remember. When I was younger, it was no secret that I liked being the center of attention. So my family naturally assumed I did this for the attention and laughs that it evoked. But as I got older, they realized it really wasn’t an act. If only it was! Although it can be humorous, it has also been the cause of many awkward situations.

Not only do I mix up words, but I also mix up phrases and clichés. 99% of the time I don’t realize it until I notice the confused/amused look on someone’s face. For many years, when getting this look, I would insist: 

 “It’s a saying.” To which, he/she would inform me of what the correct phrase actually was. Now, I’ve learned. If I get that look, I immediately ask: “What did I mean to say?”

Here are some recent examples:

Last night, I was explaining how a guy at work got upset because everything was going wrong. I said that he “blew the handle.” I was then told that he actually “flew off the handle” or “blew a gasket.”  

I have explained that someone was “sick as a horse” rather than a dog.

Along the same lines, just today I explained that my poor classmate was “dog sick.” But apparently the phrase is “dog tired.” So you can be “sick as a dog” but not “dog sick.” Sometimes clichés really don’t seem logical. 

I’ve also recently said that we’d have to “eat the bullet” rather than “eat it” or “bite the bullet.”

I do know that I’m not alone in my cliché-confusion. I heard a comedian who has a wife that the same thing. He calls the slip-ups: “Heatherisms.” So my family calls mine: “Joleneisms.”

Does anyone else confuse clichés?

Birthday = Chocolate

My birthday is this coming Sunday. So this week I’ve been treating myself to delicious double fudge chocolate chip brownies with chocolate fudge frosting. It’s my birthday present to me.

I considered making fudge too, but then I realized that might be a bit too much (considering I also traditionally make myself a chocolate birthday cake). Speaking of cake, I am such a fiend for frosting that I cut my piece of cake in half – the bottom being just cake, and the top being mostly frosting. Then I’ll eat the plain cake with a bite of ice cream (chocolate of course), and save the frosting for last.

I tend to rationalize my chocolate obsession/addiction. I sometimes eat loads of fruits and veggies to “cancel” out the chocolate I just inhaled. I have also even skipped meals to have extra chocolate – “extra” meaning above my typical daily chocolate intake.

Does anyone else have rationalizations for feeding your sweet-tooth?    

Word Confusion

I sometimes have issues remembering the right word in casual conversation. It’s not because I try to impress people with eloquent verbiage. No, not at all. It’s the simple words that often elude me. And I usually end up blurting out the wrong word in its place. Sometimes I don’t even realize the blunder until I see the look on the other person’s face.

I most often confuse nouns. Some examples of types of my slip-ups are:

• “I put the dishes in the garbage” (meaning dishwasher).
• “I put the mail in the sink” (meaning on the table).

Sometimes the bloopers are somewhat logical:

• If I am teaching a violin lesson right after writing something, I say, “Start at the beginning of this sentence” when I mean “measure.” I have also said, “Go back to this period” when I meant “note.” And, “Start at this stanza” when poetry has been on my brain.
• I may say, “My laundry is in the fridge” if I am standing in front of the refrigerator.
• I may also say, “I want to take a walk with my homework” – Oh wait, no I wouldn’t say that one. I think I just experienced word-confusion on paper!

Sometimes I’ll realize that I can’t think of the right word and will pause for a bit with my brow scrunched in deep, brain-wracking thought. Other times, I’ll hold out an “ahhhhhhh” as I try to remember.

More recently, I’ve begun a new tactic that has proved quite successful – I act out the word I’m looking for or use other words to describe it (kind of like a game, except I can’t remember the correct answer until I hear it). The irony is that I will often describe the simplest of words with words that are significantly more complex. It really doesn’t make much sense.

Unfortunately, I feel rather alone in this dilemma of word confusion because I’ve never met anyone else who has this problem!

Confessions of a Chocoholic

I work at a restaurant that has the most wonderful chocolate Ganache cake. I always recommend it to my customers. It’s a rich, decadent chocolate – similar to the consistency of cheesecake – with a rich Oreo cookie crust. Everyone that I have served it to has absolutely loved it. 

Sometimes though, the guests that are too full from their meals don’t finish their Ganache. Such a shame! It is during these rare times that I do something I once swore I’d never do: After taking the dish away, I grab a fork and finish off the Ganache myself. This has shocked many of my friends that consider me germ phobic. But I just mentally pretend that the customers are friends of mine. And that’s all it takes for me to easily dig into their half-eaten dessert. 

Whenever I order chocolate Ganache for myself at work, I change the presentation a bit. It’s supposed to be served over Marion berry puree with whip cream on top. For myself, I set it on a hunk of hot fudge. And on top of the whip cream, I drizzle Hershey’s syrup. So delicious! 

Customer Review: “The chocolate ganache cake (which is actually a pie) is one of the best desserts anywhere.” 

Dune Withdrawals

This past summer I finally bought my dream bike: A blue Yamaha YFZ 450 (piped and jetted). When I found it online, I was shocked at the price. It was a thousand dollars less than other comparable ones I had been looking at. I wondered what was wrong with it. After calling, the man insisted that it was fine and ran great. So I went to see for myself. The drive took over an hour. I remember feeling like I was getting ready for a first date –the emotions of excitement and nervousness simultaneously surging through me. After seeing the bike for myself, I knew it was all I had hoped for and more.

This last summer I was able to ride it on Oregon dunes with my parents and brother. My new ATV was perfect. It was louder and had more power than my old Honda 400EX. I was instantly in love!

 Typically, we take a trip to the sand dunes every three months – Thanksgiving, Spring Break, and summer (August and September). But this Thanksgiving we weren’t able to go. It’s now January and I haven’t ridden my quad since August. 

The withdrawals are becoming more frequent. Recently, I had a short dream that I heard the sound of the revving engine of my brother’s 2-stroke Honda 250R. I woke up feeling such nostalgia that I went and just sat on my ATV and reminisced. Closing my eyes, I could almost feel of the sand beneath my tires. I gripped the handlebars, imagining I was again climbing mountainous hills, taking trails, jumping hills, and riding along the shoreline. Wonderful memories. 

Last week I made pancakes. For some reason, the maple syrup reminded me of the smell of my bike’s exhaust. I breathed in deeply and smiled. 

Recently, I was driving when I accidently took a turn way too fast (50 mph on a 15 mph curve–oops!) The quick thrill and rush of adrenaline reminded me of riding. 

Somehow I’m going to have to get through the withdrawals from now to Spring Break. Until then, well, I guess there’s always chocolate.  

Hungry for Chocolate

Doesn’t every girl have an emergency chocolate stash in her purse? 

My name is Jolene; and I am a chocoholic. My preference is milk chocolate, followed by dark. In my opinion, white chocolate is wannabe chocolate. Nuts are good in chocolate. But most of the time, I crave the smooth creaminess of pure chocolate. My favorite brands are Ritter, followed by Sees, followed by Lindt, followed by Milka.

My favorite forms of chocolate (in order) are:

• Brownies - preferably triple chocolate fudge brownies
• Cake frosting
• Chocolate fudge ice cream
• Chocolate ganache
• Chocolate chip cookies - as long as there are extra chocolate chips.

Chocolate is always the appropriate dessert. But it's also good any time of the day. For breakfast on-the-go, I love chocolate chip and chocolate fudge Pop-tarts. I also add hot chocolate mix to oatmeal and Malt-O-Meal. For snacking, I like hot fudge on bread and fruit covered in chocolate sauce. I keep M&M’s handy to reward myself while reading school textbooks. After a certain amount of pages, I pop in some M&M’s, and then suck on them as long as possible to preserve the flavor. 

There have been nights (after eating chocolate at every meal and in-between meals) that I’ve gotten stomach aches to pay for my chocoholic ways. But it doesn’t stop the obsession. 

The moment my chocolate stash is depleted, I begin having withdrawals and run to the store as soon as I can. I know that I can beat the cravings if I stop consuming chocolate cold turkey for about a month. I’ve done this successfully a couple times. The only problem is that once I start eating it again, I end up right back where I started.

 

And I will admit that I have indeed been eating chocolate while writing this post. What’s a girl to do?!